How to Speak with a Family Member or Friend About their Substance Use

At Victory Recovery Partners, a network of seven addiction/recovery centers on Long Island, New York, we frequently find that the family and friends of patients often feel uncomfortable and unsure about how to approach their loved ones who are suffering from addiction. It’s certainly not an easy subject to talk about, and this becomes even more difficult when the person suffering is someone who you truly care about.  

There are a number of signs to look for, which indicate that your family member or friend may be suffering with substance use and addiction. One of the first signs is changes in their personality. This can present itself in a number of ways, including isolating and becoming distant from close friends and family, having an unpredictable mood or outbursts, and having trouble with day-to-day decision making.  

As a result of this, there will be noticeable differences in one’s day-to-day life including productivity at one’s job or school. You may miss school or work more frequently, and you may have relationship issues that are a result of addiction and substance use.  

With all of the above being said, you may be wondering how you would go about talking to someone who is suffering from addiction. You may wonder how, when, or where the best time and place is to discuss this. We recognize that starting this conversation may be difficult and stressful; however, the results of this conversation may lead someone to receive the help that they truly need to overcome their addiction. 

One step that should be taken prior to this conversation is for you to learn the facts. If someone is struggling with an alcohol addiction, learn about the short-term and long-term effects of alcohol use. It is important to educate yourself prior to bringing up substance use issues with your loved one. 

Another important step to take is realizing that time and place mean everything. For example, you do not want to have this conversation while the user is under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Also, this is a very personal conversation and should be conducted in a place where there is privacy.  

A big part of having a successful conversation about your loved one’s substance use is having the ability to listen to them. You will want to listen carefully, as you may find out the reasons for the substance use. This can include mood disorders such as depression and anxiety or dealing with ongoing trauma and violence. As you listen to your loved one, remember not to judge them. The fact that they are opening up to you about something that they may feel ashamed or embarrassed about takes a lot of strength and courage.  

Finally, you can make suggestions that will put your loved one in the best possible situation for a successful recovery. You can recommend support services, such as attending an outpatient behavioral health program at Victory Recovery Partners. However, the key here is to be patient and understanding. Your loved one may be a bit reluctant to receive the help that they truly need. Express that you are always open to having this discussion again at a later time, and that you are proud of our loved one for taking the time to discuss their substance use with you. That is the first step towards a successful recovery. 

Victory Recovery Partners, a network of seven addiction/recovery centers on Long Island, New York, specializes in outpatient substance use and addiction recovery services. We provide total care under one roof, consisting of behavioral health, psychiatric, wellness, and medication-assisted treatment services. If you or a loved one is struggling with an addiction or substance use disorder, we would like to help. For more information on Victory Recovery Partners, please visit our website www.victoryrp.com